How to Save A Life
by The Sneezing Panda
Summary: Ziva tries to talk to Tony. Song-fic- 'How to Save A Life' by The Fray


Disclaimer: I do not own NCIS or any of its characters. I don't own 'How to Save A Life' or The Fray, either.

How to Save A Life

_by The Sneezing Panda_

Song-fic

_Step one you say we need to talk  
He walks you say sit down it's just a talk  
He smiles politely back at you  
You stare politely right on through  
Some sort of window to your right  
As he goes left and you stay right  
Between the lines of fear and blame  
And you begin to wonder why you came  
_

It had been two months. Two months since Jeanne had left him. Two months since she came back and accused him of murder. Two months since he saw her last. Two months since she walked into that elevator and said,

"I wish I never met you"

He was depressed. He had lost his charm. And Ziva David was not about to stand back and watch him wallow around in misery.

That Friday night, Ziva walked up to his apartment. She knocked on the door and waited patiently for him to answer.

"Tony, I know you're in there," she had said through the wooden door. He finally opened the door and said, "yea, what?"

"We need to talk," she stated, simply.

"It's late, I can't," he said and walked back. Ziva caught the door with her foot and walked in.

"Tony, it's eight. Sit down, it's just a talk, friend-to-friend," she said with concern in her eyes. He stopped and turned around. He smiled politely back at her. She stared politely right on through. They walked over to his couch and sat down. There was a window to her right. The sun was setting. The sky was beautiful. He sat to her left.

Between them was a line of fear and blame.

There was a part of her that doubted that this could work.

And she silently began to wonder why she came.

_Where did I go wrong, I lost a friend  
Somewhere along in the bitterness  
And I would have stayed up with you all night  
Had I known how to save a life_

Somehow, Ziva David had lost one of her very best friends through the bitterness of his tragic break-up.

She was his best friend, and she would've done anything to help him. She would have stayed up with him all night, but sadly, had no clue how to save a life.

_Let him know that you know best  
Cause after all you do know best  
Try to slip past his defense  
Without granting innocence  
Lay down a list of what is wrong  
The things you've told him all along  
And pray to God, he hears you  
And pray to God, he hears you  
_

"I know best, Tony, I have lost many people who I loved in my life," she spoke the truth, "I just need you to listen."

She tried to slip past his defense, to get him to open up. She knew it wasn't right, it wasn't exactly innocent, but in this case, it was the only way to help. She tried other methods before, but he just wouldn't talk. I wasn't helping.

"I know you loved Jeanne, and I know how hard it is to lose someone you loved so much, but you can't shut everyone out, you can't shut out all the people who care about you," she started. She didn't have anything new to tell him. For the past two months, she had been trying to set him straight, pull him out of this deep depression. Nothing had worked. So once more, before she gave up, she would try again.

And she would pray to God he heard her.

_Where did I go wrong, I lost a friend  
Somewhere along in the bitterness  
And I would have stayed up with you all night  
Had I known how to save a life  
_

No matter how hard she tried, a part of Tony had died. She had lost him somewhere in all the bitterness.

She would have done whatever it took. She would have stayed up with him all night.

If only she knew how to save a life.

_As he begins to raise his voice  
You lower yours and grant him one last choice  
Drive until you lose the road  
Or break with the ones you've followed  
He will do one of two things  
He will admit to everything  
Or he'll say he's just not the same  
And you begin to wonder why you came  
_

"You'll never know, Ziva! You'll never get it! You'll never understand!" he began to raise his voice.

"Tony," she lowered her voice, "please get help. I know what I'm talking about. I lost my mother, my brother, my sister, and some of my my best friends throughout my entire life. I can't lose you, too."

There were two things he could do. He could admit to everything and get help. Or...

"I'm sorry, Ziva. I don't know what's happening to me. I'm just not the same, anymore," he said. Those words broke her heart.

She pulled him into a hug, and he hugged her back. They stayed that way for about ten minutes before he pulled away and said,

And she began to wonder why she came.

"There's something I need to do. Do you mind?" he asked, his face solemn. Hurt, pain, and anger flashed through his eyes. She nodded and left.

_Where did I go wrong, I lost a friend  
Somewhere along in the bitterness  
And I would have stayed up with you all night  
Had I known how to save a life_

_Where did I go wrong, I lost a friend  
Somewhere along in the bitterness  
And I would have stayed up with you all night  
Had I known how to save a life_

_How to save a life_

_How to save a life  
_

That Friday night, she walked out of his apartment for the very last time. There was nothing she could do. Absolutely nothing. She had lost him, her best friend, through all the bitterness. She just wanted him to be happy. She knew what was about to happen. She had seen it all before. And she let a tear escape her eyes.

There was nothing she could do.

She knew how to take people's lives, but their was one thing she didn't know how to.

She didn't know how to save a life.

She turned around, and faced his apartment for the very last time.

And for the final time in her life, she spoke to him.

"Good-bye, Tony."

_Where did I go wrong, I lost a friend  
Somewhere along in the bitterness  
And I would have stayed up with you all night  
Had I known how to save a life_

That night, as she sat in her car, she looked up at the window she had sat beside in his apartment.

She closed her eyes, took her Star of David necklace in her hands and prayed.

And heard a gunshot.

And cried.

_Where did I go wrong, I lost a friend  
Somewhere along in the bitterness  
And I would have stayed up with you all night  
Had I known how to save a life  
How to save a life_

_How to save a life_

She wondered where she went wrong. That night she lost a friend. A friend she cared so much about.

She was the last person he spoke to. His last hope. And she let him down. She didn't know how to save a life.

Next Friday, she attended his funeral.

**Wow. Really sad. OK, I've gotta write something happy now. Please, please, pleeease review, and tell me what you think. Like it, hate it, whatever. Check out some of my other stories, too :)**


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